As I looked at all those things, the what if´s of life would come to my head. What if I lose my job? What if I don´t have money? What if I can´t support myself? What if I end up alone? What if my family does not support me? What if? What if? What if? There were zillions of what if´s navigating my mind and running my show. I was so scared that I could only see the bad things happening instead of seeing the potential of new creation and feel that I can trust this universe I am living in and know that everything is part of the grand plan for my next evolution.
Once I read a book that said F.E.A.R. stands for fantasized events appearing real. When I saw this phrase, I couldn´t help but think how true that statement was. How many times our fears are so big in our heads but once we move pass them, we realized it was not that bad after all. Change generates lots of fear but the only thing that is constant in life is change. If we are not changing and growing, we are dead. Even the rock in the pond changes by the erosion of the water. It´s up to us to decide what will run our show and what fears we allow to be in our minds. Don´t get me wrong, fear is good because it allows us to think things through but when fear is so intense to paralyze us is when things are not ok.
That´s when you have to ask yourself: Do I live in misery or a half life or do I push through fear and manifest a life it´s worth living for and that when I look back I am proud of all the adventures and all the decisions I made as I walked my path? What do you choose happiness or unhappiness? What do you want for you fear or excitement?
When I was in Argentina, I learned to live in the now moment and not let my fears run the show. If you know me, you know I think million things an hour and my head is always thinking something. I have a very overactive mind! It´s good at times but other times it´s just focus on all the things that can go wrong as I always want to be prepared for whatever I face. I was sitting in my dad´s apartment and I couldn´t help but start thinking "Oh Goddess! When I get back I have to do this and that and that... Oh no... what if I ....." You can imagine all the things that would come to my mind as I face my big life transition but in those moments, I decided to stop and honor that at that time I was on vacation and I was not supposed to be worrying about these other things, I was not supposed to be letting my fears ruin my vacation, I was determined to rest and have a good time. When I get to the point of decision making I would decide, but before that, I would not worry or fear as those energies only bring more of those energies to my life.
Now, as I am in a major overhaul of life, changing my name and rebuilding my home and my life. I know that in my heart of hearts I have peace. I know I did the right thing. I made the right decision for my life and it was worth the birth pains because there was pain, there was fear, but once I moved passed it, now I am shinning with a new light and I am recreating myself in the way I want to be instead of staying in situations that brought me unhappiness or numb feelings just because I was to scared to make a choice. Life is too short and when you want to remember you are gone. The question is have you lived your life fully or have you let your fears run your show?
Many blessings,
Lady Carolina Amalia Amor
Presiding Priestess of Circulo de Isis
www.circulodeisis.org
Member of the Archdruid Union
https://sites.google.com/site/fellowshipofisiscentral/fellowship-of-isis-foundation-union-triad---archdruid-union
Founder of Tienda Roja
https://www.facebook.com/groups/441201419296609/
www.circulodeisis.org
Member of the Archdruid Union
https://sites.google.com/site/fellowshipofisiscentral/fellowship-of-isis-foundation-union-triad---archdruid-union
Founder of Tienda Roja
https://www.facebook.com/groups/441201419296609/
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