Monday, June 20, 2011

You can not go back this time....

There are times in life when we are faced with situations that make us think further than what the situation is about. They take us to places where we can see the situation as a reflection of something else going on, some internal pattern that is reflected in the exterior. It's just a manifestation of our within. Yesterday was one of those days for me. I went swimming and in the swimming pool, there was a diving board. Years have passed since the last time I jumped from a diving board and even though the board looked as if it was not that tall, I am usually afraid of heights so the visual between the board and the deep pool make it a little scary for me to jump. As I waited for my turn to jump, I kept thinking that I could do it, that it was not that hard. I kept repeating "just jump" in my mind. When it was my turn, I walked to the end of the board and I could not do it, I could not jump. Fear paralyzed me and I had to walk back. The kids that were waiting for me to jump were sort of disappointed because the older lady did not jump when they were having so much fun. After a while, I decided to give it another try and this kid was behind me trying to motivate me. It was funny to hear him saying "if he can do it, you can do it for sure" while he was pointing at a 5 year old child. He kept saying that it is scary but once you jump is so much fun. As I walk on the board, he was holding to the sides of the end preventing me from going back and he kept saying "you can not go back this time, you can not go back this time." As I jumped, I could feel all my fears dissolving and I enjoyed the dive.

It's funny how many times in life we are so afraid of change that we don't jump. We may prefer to remain in a less than perfect situation just to not rattle the cage. Status quo is better than having to face our fears and change our lifestyles. I had this situation happen to me a few weeks ago when I decided to move apartments because I couldn't take the place I lived in anymore. At the beginning, it was paralyzing to have to find a new place, pack everything, unpack everything... just the thought would put fear in my head but now, I am so much happier. Like jumping from the diving board, once I took the first step, the fear dissolved and I could enjoy the ride. How many times have you wanted to change something in your life but not done so because you were afraid? How many times did you take one step to then go back and hide because fear was controlling you?

There are times in life when we get to a point when we can not go back and the question is ... are you ready to jump?

Blessings )0(

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