Power is a word that is so loaded in today's world. It seems that everyone wants to be powerful or have power, but the question is what is power? I've been observing others lately to see traits of power and what I am finding out is that people usually confuse other emotions with power. For example, if a person is really angry, she may have this energy around her what may make her intimidating to others but that power is not real power, that power comes from anger held inside that in the end will implode and need to get out.
Other type of dynamic I have seen is people using manipulation as a way to control or have power over others. This dynamic usually shows traits of victim behavior or martyr behavior where the person tries to control others by using guilt and pity. Is this real power? I don't think so.
Then, we have the dynamic of parent/child or superior/inferior where a person is positioning herself above others as a mother who has all the answers and everyone else is below but this person is usually very insecure and needs to control others by putting herself on top. Is this real power? I don't think so.
I see power as that place where the person is neutral showing no emotion but that type of assertiveness that allows others to see that she is standing on the ground and there is no anger, no fear, no anxiety, no victim behavior, no emotion, just assertiveness and resolution. That's the power I am talking about. The power that comes from true sovereignty. It is the power that appears when a person takes responsibility for her journey, who knows she is always choosing and her choices manifest her journey, a person that is not afraid to express her opinion but when she does, it does not come as defensive or aggressive but as strong and determined. It is the power that comes from "committing to engaging in the process of our own transformation, the search for our inner wisdom, the development of our self-esteem, the elevation of our status and standing, we are consciously choosing to accept total cause-and-effect accountability for our own lives and living." (The Queen of My Self by Donna Henes). When a person achieves this type of power, it is seen by others as presence. This person walks in the room and everyone knows that she knows her value and she her rights, she is powerful and does not need to be forceful or aggressive to show she is powerful because her presence reflects that. There are no words to describe it but it is felt by everyone, it's the presence in the room that makes her power known.
The other day, I was reading and saw once again women described as weak or fragile instead of powerful, and I couldn't help but think. Here we go again, this is the type of thing that is robbing women from their power. It is the fact that society paints a picture that is not true because patriarchy is afraid of women's power. How can patriarchy say that women are weak and fragile when we can endure lots of pain such as giving birth? Yes, it is true, they are trying to take that power away by offering painkillers and things to alleviate the pain but we women can endure it, we have the power. I think the time has come for women to reflect on the word power, but not the power that comes from patriarchy mentality. We need to claim our real power and be the Queens of our lives by taking ownership of our journey, being aware of our own choices, and standing strong in what we believe. We don't need anyone to validate us, we just need to connect with our Goddess within and feel the power that comes from that spark. Let's stand strong! Let's claim our power! Never give your power away!